Valentine’s Day: Your Key to Dating Chinese Women

Chinese woman in red dress
China Brides Caption logo Take Valentine’s day as an opportunity to date a beautiful Chinese woman.

Have you ever wanted to ask out a beautiful Chinese woman but weren’t quite sure where to begin? February is fast approaching, so it only makes sense to prepare for that one day that the month is known for – Valentine’s day. But why can’t you ask her out any other day? Why does it have to be February 14 and not the 25th?

For starters, no one wants to be single on Valentine’s day. And while men outnumber women in China, there is a large population of single women still unpartnered. One of the reasons for that is the inability of Chinese men to meet marrying standards in terms of income, education, and age. This has created a gap in the dating pool, one which the women are looking towards foreign men to fill.

If a woman from China is your type, then this is a fantastic opportunity to find the partner you have been dreaming of. But it can be intimidating when you don’t know much about her culture. If you want to get off on the right foot, you’re going to have to come in prepared. So here are a few key points that, when taken to heart, can help you in your quest to sweep your Chinese date off her feet.

There is such a thing as a Chinese Valentine’s day.

The Qixi Festival is a Chinese festival of love, celebrated every 7th day of the 7th Chinese Lunar month - normally around August for the rest of the world. It commemorates the mythological story of the forbidden love of the cowherd and the weaver.

While it was never intended to be a Valentine’s-type holiday, commercial and corporate interests have pushed for it to be the Chinese Valentine’s day.

Does that mean you have to scrap your plans for February? Not at all. Whether you are dating in China or in the United States, February 14 is still a thing, especially among the younger generation who prefer the Western version.

Get her a gift.

Gifts are a big thing in Chinese culture. But don’t make the mistake of thinking that everything is different in China. Dating Chinese women is generally the same as dating women all over the world, except for a few nuances listed below.

So get her something in the classic tradition of V-day, like gourmet chocolates, roses, and a hand-written letter. While jewelry is nice, you might want to save that for when your relationship is a little more solid.

If you want to be on the safe side, you can do a bit more research by asking one of her friends if she is the superstitious type. For example, in the unlikely event that you choose to give your superstitious date a pair of shoes, she could take it as an omen that your relationship has ended before it has even begun.

Chinese woman looking at a glass of wine
China Brides Caption logo There are lots of lonely women in China looking to give foreign men a chance.

Basic Chinese Dating Tips

While dating a Chinese girl is mostly the same as you would any other woman, her foreign culture dictates that certain norms and expectations are in play. Here are a few of them:

1. The man pays for everything.

Even if she insists on contributing her share of the bill, you need to insist more strongly on paying for everything.

2. Your status matters to her.

Many Chinese women are single simply because they are more successful than their potential suitors. In your case, you need to be aware that men are expected to provide for everything, which is why foreigners, especially rich ones, are highly desirable.

But at the end of the day, love goes beyond what’s in your bank account. So be confident in who you are, and you should be fine.

3. Feminine on the outside, strong on the inside

Chinese women are quite feminine in the way they dress and in the demure way they present themselves. But don’t let your date’s delicate exterior fool you - she’s a tiger underneath.

Chinese people on average are very direct and have no qualms about telling you what they want. Your date may ask you about your personal and financial details without stuttering. She can tell you what she doesn’t like about you with a straight face. So instead of being taken aback, understand that this is the way she is. At the end of the day, honesty is still the best policy.

4. They take affection seriously.

While China’s modern youth aren’t exactly pinnacles of conservatism, being old-fashioned is still quite fashionable in China. Therefore, keep your expectations in check.

Intimacy is serious business for the Chinese. And depending on your date’s threshold for affection, you may not be getting any touches soon - even if she is head-over-heels for you.

Understandably, this may concern you, especially if you don’t know how to tell if a Chinese woman likes you. So don’t be afraid to be honest with her. Ask her what she is comfortable with and what boundaries she has so you can respect them.

man with arms over woman’s shoulder
China Brides Caption logo Chinese culture is very conservative, so make sure that you get her approval to show affection.

5. Family is everything.

Family is so important that you shouldn’t be surprised if she brings along her mother as a chaperone. Of course, that’s not very common, but her parent’s approval of you is a big deal. So if this is a woman you feel you want to sacrifice everything for, then start by pleasing her parents.

Simply enjoy yourself.

Dating a Chinese woman certainly involves following certain rules. But when has love ever been bound by “the rules?” You could take the opportunity to explain to your lovely date that Valentine’s day started when Saint Valentine himself broke the rules and facilitated the marriage of young couples, defying the emperor’s decree and getting executed for it.

So be yourself. Show her your brand of love and romance. If she wanted to date a guy who acts like every other Chinese guy, then she’d be dating a Chinese guy. But no, she’s dating you. On Valentine’s day. So step up to the plate and sweep her off her feet.


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